Writing conferences and business cards

I've been writing completely the wrong way.

Last year I went to the League of Utah Writers Conference in Park City and encountered something I was totally unprepared for. It wasn't harsh/helpful critique, swoon-worthy celebrity guests or a wealth of helpful information on writing/editing/publishing. I'm not saying those factors weren't present, but I was prepared for them. The surprise was the wealth of business cards that ended up in my pockets and in my purse. Everyone—and I mean everyone had one—except me.

This year's conference is coming up on Friday/Saturday and I plan to be prepared this time. I won't waste my time honing my latest manuscript. Instead, I plan to go armed with the bestest business card ever. I saw some pretty awesome business cards last year, so the stakes are high, but I was raised with five brothers and this makes me highly competitive. I also minored in professional and technical writing and I'm a freelance document designer. (Credentials proffered.) So in an effort to outdo the rest of the writing world (suck it, writing world!), I trolled the Internet for the coolest business cards ever. Below are some of the best business card offerings.

Die-cut
Cool die-cut face case with matching hair-colored card.

Pop-up
Pop-up figure card! Fun for everyone!

Impressive
Impressive official document-style card--is there a bubble-wrap card?

Balloon card
Balloon card? Can I make animals with them?!

Super-friendly
Super-friendly business cards!

Impressive retro
Impressive retro envelope wax seal card.

Dazzle you
Or good grammar or em-dashes....


Showcasing skills
Showcasing skills! Seems like a good idea.

Yes, my intention is to have an awesome business card in time for the conference. But in reality, I'll probably end up with something like this:

My name is Cynthia
My name is Cynthia
A girl can only do so much....

Setting sketch - fantasy

Middle Earth
Middle Earth
Setting is as much a part of a story as each character is. Whereas a dynamic character can draw a reader in, a well-formed landscape can lend realism to an otherwise foreign story. I've never been much for fantasy, but I've read The Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia—as a matter of fact, I took a Tolkien/Lewis college course, which allowed me to geek out completely and included Lewis' lesser-known Space Trilogy, which I'll discuss in another post. I've read a few other stories that were set in mystical places—some worked well and some seemed to be trying too hard to ride the coattails of Tolkien's success. I mean, who hasn't wanted to live in a cozy Hobbit-hole for a day?

The Hero's Journey

Campbellian Monomyth:

Fantasy authors are usually intimately familiar with the Campbellian Monomyth (as illustrated) and implement the elements to varying degrees. They tend to fall back on the favorite mystical characters—elves, dwarves, trolls and dragons. And there's a map. There always seems to be a damn map.

Maps:

Most of us remember the map of Middle Earth created for Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Hobbit and the scripture behind the story, The Silmarillian. And if you weren't a Tolkien nerdling before, you're almost certainly one after the release of the epic movies.

Narnia
Narnia
Tolkien contemporary, C.S. Lewis created a map for The Chronicles of Narnia to help us bring all seven stories together. Following in the great cartographic tradition, Stephen R. Donaldson's Chronicles of Thomas Covenant is mapparific. Terry Prachett's Discworld has a map complete with a giant turtle,and Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series is all mapped up.  I know there are more great fantasy maps, but you can only fit so many in one blog. Never fear, there are tools that allow you to make your own fantasy world map if you so choose.

Decoding:

Discworld
Discworld
But it takes more than the map to help readers and viewers decode a strange new place. It's about making that strange place seem familiar—homey even. Oftentimes, authors are so hell-bent on making their mythical place different from any other mythical place that's ever been invented since the dawn of time, that the names are unpronounceable and the characters are unbelievable. We just can't quite identify with Drychnark the half hellhound, half earthworm from Yrting as he swings through the canopy of his Ulrgark-ridden world searching for the golden naaayk, which will banish the unwanted Ulgark scourge and restore his ravaged home. To help us feel something for Drychnark, put him in a believable setting and give him and his surroundings pronounceable names

The Land
The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant

Rule #1:

The first and most important thing you need to keep in mind if you're creating a fantasy world is that you can't be lazy and create something believable and unique at the same time. Creating a world takes time, patience and intelligence. Just ask God. You have to do your research—read what's been written already and know your new world inside and out before you start. Inconsistency is annoying and it alienates readers and viewers. Oftentimes, writers choose a real place and plunk their fantasy world on top of it. This helps give them a frame of reference. Then they set about renaming things like a giant army conquering a small country. That's right. It makes you kind of a bastard.

Rule #2:

The second thing you need to keep in mind is that readers and viewers don't want you to barf this new place out at them all at once. They want to be introduced to it slowly—to allow them time to acclimate before you introduce another oddity. This is a lot like undressing. Throwing off your clothes in the middle of the street screaming "look at my body! It's glorious!" is called flashing, and even if your body is glorious, you can get arrested for that. Letting your clothes fall off piece by piece in an intimate setting is either called foreplay or stripping, but both are usually better received than flashing. Think of introducing your new world as a striptease. Strip away the layers slowly to build interest and stimulate readers and viewers. Are you with me?

Rule #3:

The Wheel of Time
The Wheel of Time
The third thing you need to keep in mind is that if you decide to defy the laws of physics for any reason--although that propels us dangerously close to sci-fi--you need to be able to explain it. Again, laziness is no good here. If you take shortcuts, readers and viewers get annoyed and they won't connect with your story. Have explanations for things even if you don't spell them out in your story.

Map on:

Once your world is built, you can start spinning your story. And you can make a map to place in the front of the book if you feel so inclined.

Blog off.
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Character sketch - the hero


Sam and Dean Winchester
Sam and Dean Winchester
If I write a blog post about heroines, I am morally obligated to follow up with a post about heroes. And there are some good ones out there. 

What makes a good hero? He must be strong, but able to put his arms down (sorry Governator!). He must be complicated—maybe even a little tortured, but not unreachable. He must have good intentions that sometimes go awry. He must spend forever trying to make up for his mistakes and misdeeds. It doesn't hurt if he has awesome fighting skills and wit. Added bonuses: a cool car, stylish clothes and possibly a sidekick or two (see previous post on sidekicks).


Angel
Angel
When I was in college, I wrote an essay comparing heroes and heroines from literature. I specifically remember comparing Hercules and The Duchess of Malfi. It's a strange comparison, especially since the duchess never slew a lion or hydra or stole various livestock or fruit to appease the angry gods, so I won't get into it here. Suffice it to say, that mythological heroes were forced to perform daunting tasks. Epically daunting. I mean, I'm pretty brave, but someone asks me to bring them a three-headed hellhound and I'm out.

It wasn't just Hercules, who was forced to perform terrifying tasks. Theseus, Odysseus, Perseus, Jason and Orpheus all performed their tasks with bravado and style. Because these guys were so cool, contemporary heroes sometimes follow suit--performing seemingly impossible tasks to pay penance for some misdeed, for vengeance purposes or as a rescue. Action movies are fraught with stories about a thug, playboy or goof-off who has to rise above his ego to save the world, the town, the girl or some cute kid.
Maximus Decimus Meridius
Maximus Decimus Meridius

Something you should know about me—
when it comes to movies, I’m a total dude. I like action, car chases and well-choreographed fight scenes. But intelligence and wit are super sexy. So is social consciousness. If a hero can pull all of these off simultaneously, well he has my heart. Also, I don't like being treated like I'm helpless. With that formula, I suppose the perfect way to meet a hero like that would go something like this:

(Scene: streetside cafe—lunchtime)

"Hello," he croons, setting down his copy of Plato's Republic. "I couldn't help but notice this guy seems to be bothering you."
Beowulf
Beowulf

"I can handle it," you hiss. "Move along."

"You appear to be favoring your arm when you're punching this guy. Can I help?"

"It's just because I sprained my shoulder being awesome last week. And this beefy bully  is harassing my grandma." 

Your hero takes a step back. "Would you hold this?" he asks, handing you his puppy, who nuzzles up under your chin in a totally non-annoying snuggle. 
Robert McCall
Robert McCall

"I don't need help," you mutter, but your arm is throbbing. You could use a rest.

You lean against his Aston Martin while he wails on the bully with what appears to be a mixture between jujitsu, street fighting and yoga. 
When the bully is dispatched, your hero pulls out a chair for your grandma (if a chair isn't available, he'll fashion one out of what's left of the bully) and hands you a single rose that somehow wafted onto the sidewalk while he was fighting.

"Let me pay for your lunch," you say, exchanging the puppy for the rose. "It's the least I can do."
Mahatma Ghandi
Mahatma Ghandi

"Absolutely not," he whispers, looking through you for a moment, his eyes unfocused. "It's true a significant amount of my income goes to charities for starving children, literacy and support groups for women, LGBT and other minorities, but I invest wisely and started saving while I was young, so I'm independently wealthy. (Translates to: I have a lot of money, but I am not completely spoiled, plus I'm really responsible.)

"Oh thank you," you say. "By the way, that's a really cool shirt." 

"I apologize," he says, blushing. "But I seem to have gotten some bully blood on your grandma. Shall we take her home and then grab a drink?"

"That sounds wonderful," you say.

"I hope it's not too early for a nice white wine," he whispers.
Ralph Hinkley
Ralph Hinkley

"I'll just have a beer," you whisper back.

He smiles.

That being said, some of my favorite heroes are:
  • Angel from Angel (TV)—because he can mope and fight and looks equally sexy doing both
  • Sherlock Holmes from The Complete Sherlock Holmes—because he is so damn smart
  • Mahatma Ghandi from real freaking life—because he was from real freaking life
  • Ralph Hinkley from The Greatest American Hero (TV)—because he had no clue what he was doing, but he kept doing it
  • Samwise Gamgee from The Lord of the Rings—because he was full of undying loyalty and determination
  • Superman from movies, TV and comic books—because he doesn’t even belong here, but he keeps saving us anyway
  • Robert McCall from The Equalizer (TV)—supercool retired British spy who spends his time trying to help set the world right
  • Sir Gawain from Sir Gawain and the Green Knight—you're going to have to read it
  • Moses from The Ten Commandments—because he...you know...freed a whole bunch of people AND got the girl
  • Jarod from The Pretender (TV)—smart, cute and witty
  • Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird—because of this link
  • The Terminator from The Terminator—too beefy to put his arms down, but he's a soulless robot with a soul, so points there
  • Sam and Dean Winchester from Supernatural (TV)—let’s see, cute, funny, tough and they’ve literally been to hell and back
  • Maximus Decimus Meridius from The Gladiator—indomnitable spirit against insurmountable odds
  • Odysseus from The Odyssey—because he not only fought evil with brawn, but brains as well—also has been to hell and back
  • Beowulf from Beowulf—fights Grendel, Grendel's mama, various sea creatures and a dragon. Dude.
  • James Bond from the movies and books (but mostly Sean Connery and Daniel Craig)--because—accent and abs, respectively.
Blog off.

Also, watch this for fun: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQgAgybqOpg
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Character sketch - awesomeness

Awesomeness can be inherent or learned. It can be real or delusional (and delusional awesomeness is hilarious/annoying). The most awesome people I know are awesome because they're not trying to be. They're just:
  1. really comfortable in their skin 
  2. really good at everything they do (and reasonably humble about it)
  3. persistently amazing friends


If someone happens to be all three of these, well then he or she has been fortunate enough to reach  Awesome Trifecta Status (or ATS)--the Bermuda's Triangle of Awesomeness, where anything lame magically turns to awesome at the touch of his or her hands. This is a great place to be. I've heard.

I thought about including a list of people I know who are awesome and the numbers of their corresponding awesome building blocks as mentioned above, but I think this will only:

  1. alienate my friends who are not awesome and just now finding out (just kidding, ALL my friends are awesome!)
  2. single out those of my friends who are awesome, but who have not yet attained ATS
  3. boost the egos of my friends who have reached aforementioned status, thereby invalidating the parenthetical portion of #2 and creating an Awesome Paradox

Suffice it to say that I have been blessed with many awesome friends and continue to meet new awesomes as the world tumbles along. This planet is filled with them--sometimes cropping up where you least expect them--but you can find them if you are open to it. Often we get so caught up in our quest for internal awesomeness that we forget to embrace external awesomeness when we see it. Embracing it will only enhance our own, so grab it whenever you can--even if it's only for a moment.

That being said, the Awesome Trifecta is hard to find in real life. #1 is the kicker, usually. People tend to be weirdly insecure, and their insecurities keep themselves from reaching ATS. Because of this, I rarely write characters who are truly awesome. I tend to write those who get caught up in delusional awesomeness instead. True awesomeness is as elusive as true altruism, and therefore seems like fiction. And we all know that people don't like their fiction to seem like fiction.


Blog off.



Character sketch - creepiness


Watch The Creep here
The creepiest character I've read to date is Humbert Humbert from Lolita. I was introduced to him via book on tape (read by Jeremy Irons aka Scar from The Lion King) in my car on the way to work and was seriously worried that if I got pulled over, I might go to jail on suspicion of severe creepiness just for listening to it.

All of my creepy characters are based off one person in my life. Without giving too much information, because he is a human being, this guy seemed to be the ultimate creep--in the way he always showed up when you didn't want him to (which was any time), in his appearance, in the way he talked and in the way he looked at you. You always had this sneaking suspicion that he had just done, or was about to do something weird, perverted and/or illegal. And he didn't know how to take "no" for an answer. He was always trying to hug or touch people, often getting yelled at or slapped in the process. If you kicked him out of your party, he'd linger outside the doorway, peeking in, trying to make conversation with whomever would respond. And if no one responded, he seemed okay with that. He always trying to be part of something, which made me wonder about how he'd gotten to that place--what was his home life was like. I started wondering how he'd been treated as a small child, or how much, if any, attention he got from his parents. If he even had parents. I wondered who loved him and why he was so passionate about the things he was passionate about. I wondered what his house looked like--his bedroom.

I know, right? Who's the creep now? (Me.) But thinking about these things has helped me understand people who appear to be creepy. They're just people who never learned how to process and deal with the world. Whether they're a shy creep (George McFly) or a loud creep (Biff Tannen), creeps don't just materialize out of thin air. They are born of creepiness, heir to creepiness and parent to creepiness. And just like my insane and douchey characters, they come from somewhere.

See Top Ten Creepy Characters from movies.


Character sketch - douchiness

Sometimes my characters are douches. Actually, this happens a lot. My method? First of all, I eat salt and vinegar chips to get myself in the mood. I don't know why this flavor freaks me out so much. I mean, I like vinegar a lot. But for some reason, salt and vinegar chips remind me of douche. Second of all, I think of, not only the people in my life who are epically egocentric, but also how I would probably be if I didn't have this pesky thing called a conscience. I'm far from sainthood--but since I am non-religious, I try to hold myself to a higher moral standard to prove to myself that I don't need to be good based solely on the fear that I may burn in eternal hellfire if I'm not.

But I digress.Writing a douchey character is similar to writing any other character. You just have to make sure they have realistic motivations and a good backstory. Random or over-the-top douchery is annoying. So I call upon the memory of the douches in my life, past and present and pay homage to them for their contributions, e.g.:

  • The guy I worked with who bragged that his sisters called him a "douche rocket" and liked to pester, irritate and/or openly mock everyone around him. He was most triumphant when he made a female co-worker cry or beat the shit out of a Buddha-head with a golf club because he thought it was ugly.
  • The neighbor who insists on parking 1.5 millimeters from my car. Literally, I cannot fit my hand between the bumpers.
  • The guy I dated who stormed out of my house, slammed the door so hard it bounced all the way back open and peeled out of my driveway. The reason for his temper tantrum? I could break it down, but all that matters is that is was not a good one. He called me when he got home, but I didn't answer. I never saw him again despite his best attempts.
  • The fellow English major in my Renaissance Literature class, who asked to speak with me in the hallway after class, then proceeded to rant at me for disagreeing with his interpretation of The Compass by John Donne, insisting I made him look foolish in front of his peers. No. You did that all on your own. You're shouting the exclamation mark on it right now.
Those are a few off the top of my head. I'm sure there are many more douche rockets out there-- fodder for a new story. In the meantime, my two favorite douche-inspired quotes are from Einstein and Misty Evans, respectively. 

<----Einstein's quote:

Misty's quote:
"He's a douche, Cynthia. My vagina is pH-balanced just from being in the same country with him!"

Blog off.

Character sketch - insanity

When I write, I try to give my characters realistic motivations. People aren't evil just to be evil--not your mother-in-law or your crazy ex, despite what you think. They usually have a reason for their behavior and feel justified on some level. I've written a couple of crazy characters and had to try to get inside their heads, so I started to wonder what could drive me to insanity. What would really make me act crazy? And then I thought back to those moments in my life when I had acted crazy. There are a few....

Being a die-hard list-maker, I've compiled a list of things that could or have made me crazy in order of severity and potential bodily harm to myself or others:

1. Someone threatening, annoying or in some way endangering my children
2. Lack of sleep
3. Irrational behavior from other people
4. Inexplicably losing something forever
5. Too much vodka

Threatening my children: I could kill for this. And I don't mean I get annoyed and I'm all "I could totally kill them." I mean I could see myself assessing a serious threat to my child and then making it go away through legal or illegal means if necessary. I'm normally a calm person. Some might say pleasant even, but there was that incident on the playground once upon a time where a grown woman was humiliating my 5-year-old and I verbally shredded her. It was a verbal shredding only, but it left mental scars and an almost palpable feeling of foreboding that lingered around the tunnel slide for months like a wandering spirit. It was with massive restraint that I kept myself from shoving her face into the dirt and kneeling on the back of her head until she vomited mud. Flash forward 12 years to when I rabid, minced and repeated with a vice principal, who called me back and offered an apology ten minutes later. I think he was sniffling. Crazy moments brought to you by Cynthia.

Lack of sleep: We all get crazy when we don't sleep. I go through bouts of insomnia, but refuse to take sleep aids because the idea of pharmaceutically incapacitating myself on purpose unsettles me. Instead, I stumble through my days half awake and babble incoherently at my coworkers, sometimes answering their questions ten minutes after they ask them. I see awkward and strange things in my peripheral vision and feel a one-sided kinship with Lewis Carroll, who must have written Alice's Adventures in Wonderland based on images from his sleep-deprived peripheral vision. Or drugs. Or a combination. I also remember a social worker telling me not to judge people who have random acts of terrible parenting, because extreme circumstances drive us to extremes and lack of sleep is a doozy.

Irrational behavior: The complete lack of common courtesy freaks me out. When a neighbor's random house guest parked their car in my driveway, I almost flipped my lid because WHO DOES THAT?! Also when the same neighbor's giant half-lame lab pooped on my lawn for the 57th time while the neighbor was watching, I may have picked up said poop, put it in a paper bag and deposited it on her porch. She was all, "Why would you put poop on my doorstep?" And I was all, "It's your poop. It was giving it back to you. You're welcome. At least I was nice enough to bag it!" I admit it was crazy, but that's the point, and I felt terrible about it afterwards. But it wasn't the inconvenience of not being able to park in my own driveway or picking a giant, steaming poop off my lawn that set me off, it was the fact that it never should have happened.

Losing something: Obviously, losing people is hard. And I've lost a lot, which is why one of my favorite poems is Elizabeth Bishop's One Art. I've had to say goodbye to family members and good friends in a scale of degrees ranging from semi-permanent to ultra-permanent. But I'm also talking about the phenomenon of sitting down with something on your lap and it suddenly quantum tunnels to nowhere forever. Like scissors. Or car keys. Or your phone that you were just talking on. Or those times you spend an hour looking for something that was right there a second ago. That doesn't necessarily make me act crazy so much a feel like I've already lost my mind.


Too much vodka: I mean...come one. Vodka, coffee, Red Bull, Twizzlers--water even (or dilutional hyponatremia) can be fatal. Too much of anything can make you nutty, right? You don't need the details. Just use your imagination for that one.

To read about more things that can make you crazy, see this page and be astounded.

Blog off.




“Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.” ― Jarod Kintz

Lately I've been having what you might call "weird-ass" dreams, partly due to an unfortunate fever I've been running, and partly due to the fact that I have an over-active imagination that spills over into the nighttime. Fortunately, I've been told that this is how bestsellers and religions begin. Since I'm in no mood to write scripture, I figured I'd scribble my dreams into stories, which I reserve the right to later turn into a religion if I so choose. One has resulted in a 300-page novel and the other is currently spinning into a short story.

There are five steps to the writing process as follows:
1. Think
2. Write
3. Make it better
4. Make it correct
5. Share the product

I've got number one down because I do my best thinking when I'm unconscious. If only I could submit in my sleep, I'd have it made. Number two is easy for me, but I get stuck on numbers three and four because I'm a bit of a perfectionist. I tend to edit forever. In layers. I'll do an overall copy edit to catch typos and late-night or boozy meanderings, then I'll isolate and refine the protagonist's dialogue and then each major character. I'll do an edit for technical accuracy (with the help of subject matter experts, the Internet and books), one for geographical accuracy (usually with the help of Google maps in lieu of actual travel) and then whatever other aspects are present in the story--medical research, historical research, etc.

I won't even say it's the submission process I hate, because that's over-said and sounds defeatist and whiny.But it's where I get stymied. So I suppose I'm implying it.

"I submitted manuscripts to publishers. This was not so much a feeling that I should be published as a wish to escape the feared and hated drudgery of normal work." -Tanith Lee

Blog off.

Penumbra

When I was in sixth grade, I read more than 200 books and saw my first lunar eclipse. I remember it from penumbra to penumbra, not just the way it looked, so three-dimensional and amber, bulging out of the night sky, but the way I felt when I saw it. I remember knowing I needed to capture that moment somehow, that it was too beautiful to let pass without some kind of memorial. I didn't have a camera, so I sketched it (badly) in pencil on notebook paper. I wanted to never forget.

There have been times when I've felt so inspired to write that I almost couldn't do anything else, and there are times when I've felt I had no words in me. During the wordless times, I turn back to my first lunar eclipse and remember the way it looked. And the way I felt. And then I build on that memory. I remember where I sat that night and sketched at the sky. I remember the field in Texas behind my house, filled with tiny flowers stretching out endlessly. I remember the thunderstorms and honeysuckle and prickly pear. I remember that the world felt unexplored.

This year has been busy in a good way. I've scrambled from event to event. I've accomplished a lot, but stared blankly at my computer screen, notepads and Delta drink napkins. Where there would have been words, there is a flicker, a line, a smear of wine. But tonight I am remembering that field in Texas. I'm going back to the eclipse.


Perspiration

Writing is easy. Great writing is hard--especially since great writing has so many layers.You want to write a novel? Just write it. Write?

First you have to know how to tell a good story. I know a lot of people who are terrible writers with great stories. Readers want to be engaged. They want to feel what the characters are feeling. They want to be transported to a different place. It doesn't have to be another planet (it should rarely be another planet) but it should be convincing. This is also very subjective. My great story may not be your great story.

Second, you have to read extensively--especially in the genre you want to represent. I can't stress this enough. Read, write, read, read, write.

Third, you have to understand that less is more. It's not necessary to fill your sentences with as many unique  and obscure adjectives as you can you can find in your thesaurus. Everyone's veins don't need to be cabling fiercely out of their necks. No one needs to traverse any distances. That type of writing doesn't feel honest. I wrote a novel two years ago and recently cut out 10,000 unnecessary words because when all was said and done, they weren't telling the story, they were untelling it.

Which brings me to the fourth item--show don't tell. Writers know what this means. It's our mantra. Essentially it means instead of writing "He stood dejectedly in the doorway, sad to see her go," write something like "He stood in the doorway, shifting from foot to foot. His shoulders dropped as she walked away." Also, don't ever write "dejectedly" into anything.

Fifth, the devil is in the details. They really bring a story to life. Add colors, smells, sounds and textures to your story

Sixth, find some beta readers--at least a dozen. It's really hard to be objective about your own writing. Writers tend to see their work in black or white. It's either the most amazing thing ever written or it's the worst crap they've ever read--depending on the day. Let other people read your work and listen to what they have to say about it. If you get defensive, you won't get usable feedback and your story will suffer.

Seventh, find an editor who isn't you. See above. You can't be objective about your own writing. I'm a tech writer in a critique group with another tech writer a multi-book published author and a freelance writer. After we all edited my novel, my friend who works in the financial services industry found a dozen typos we'd all missed.

By this time you will have cried and sweated over your story. You will have fallen in love with your characters. You'll hate them. You'll have a crush on them. You'll never want to hear their names again. You'll have dreams and nightmares about your story. You may even forget they're fictional sometimes.

This is why writers drink.


Inspiration

Writers get inspiration from anywhere--an overheard conversation in a restaurant or a drop of oily water in the street. Inspiration is in imperfection. In perfection. In beginnings and endings. It's in fireball meteors or a beautiful photograph.

I often get midnight epiphanies based on a sound I misheard in a sleepy stupor or a half-dream I had two nights before. I wrote an entire novel based on the mental snapshot of a toddler scrambling ferociously up a hill in hopes of catching a glimpse of the sun.

If you Google "Strange Events" and hit the Images button, you have myriad story ideas at your fingertips including a street sign that says "Caution Zombies Ahead" and an astronaut carved into a 900 year old cathedral in Salamanca, Spain. (Apparently, someone felt the need to add it in the 1992 restoration, but still, great inspiration.) Of course if you're creative and you stare at your shower curtain long enough, you can find inspiration there too.

I am currently finding inspiration in a cup of coffee while I power through some articles I'm writing on the side. And there is a surprising amount of inspiration in the comfort of a cup of coffee. I could never been one of those writers who writes better drunk. I prefer to be alert and aware. And hopefully that inspiration (and caffeine) will carry me through today till the evening when I'll be writing something more creative again.

Blog off.


NaNorific

Well folks. I did it. I NaNoWriMo-ed my butt off and finished the rough draft of a novel in 30 days. Just over 50,000 words ready to be rearranged, deleted and rewritten over the next few months. This makes novel number four, all at varying stages along the continuum of completion.

I feel like celebrating, but I'm tired, my neck hurts and my hands cramped up as I was power-typing my last 2,000 words. My forearms feel like I've been doing pull-ups all night. And here I've been wasting time at the gym. All I need is a late-night word count panic to whip me into shape.

That being said, I want to thank those of you who helped me through this month--who encouraged me to keep writing, or even thought to ask how it was going. And now, I'm going to watch some episodes of The Big Bang Theory as my reward.

That is all.